Monday, January 2, 2017

Hello, 2017!

Okay, berhenti sekejap tulis pasal India. I nak cerita pasal tahun baru. I nak summarize my 2016.

Honestly, 2016 is not my favorite year at all. In fact, I kinda hate 2016. But, 2016 also has somehow broaden my network. I've made a lot of new friends this year. I have reconnect with a few long lost friends and I've had one of the best trip in my life so far, this year.

So, overall, my 2016 wasn't really that bad lah actually.

I've started my 2016 with a roadtrip with a few of my close friends to Kuching. It was kinda an awesome trip but a bit tiring (thank God I wasn't driving!). The journey took 28 hours on the road (from Miri to Kuching return journey) but we managed to go to a few places yang I don't think I'd ever go if it's not because of the roadtrip. So it was awesome.

Then in February, there was a celebration. My girlfriend got married! It was a happy day as we managed to meet again (all six of us) and celebrated her big day. I was one of the bridesmaid. Nothing much happened in March, except that I've made a pack with 3 of my friends that 2017 would be our year (faham tak baru awal tahun masing masing dah miserable and give up with our 2016). We promised that all of us will get married in 2017. So far, semua berjaya tunaikan janji because they finally found love in 2016 except me, as always lah but it's okay.

In April, my career took a big turn. I was transferred to another department doing something that is totally out of my expertise (macam lah I was an expert in something all this while! LOL). But I kinda like my new job sebab it was fun playing with numbers but what a big responsibility! Cuak gak lah but so far, so good. But, because I was transferred to a new department, I managed to meet with a lot of new people which is kinda cool. Seronok sebab these people sekepala and they made me looking forward to go to office everyday, yeay!

Then in May I went to Mabul and reconnect with my long lost friend, Farah (the one that I went to India together). It was awesome despite I didn't have a diving license, I basically lepak and snorkel je kat sana which is very cool. I'd definitely do it again if I could. Tapi I have to cancel my trip to Philippines during this month, sebab tuntutan kerja. Sedih okay. I really wanna go there, tapi tu lah, belum ada rezeki kot.

My misery started in June when I got involved in an affair (if I could call it an affair lah). It was something that I wish I didn't do. It was very stupid of me but things have happened kan. I don't want to elaborate much on this matter, but cukup lah I cakap it was one of the biggest mistake that I have ever made in my life. Also, during this month, rumah sewa I kena pecah masuk dengan perompak while I was in the house. Thank God I sempat call polis and my friends and the perompak tak sempat buat apa apa but I was shaken and traumatized to this day. Sampai sekarang kalau I dengar bunyi pelik kat dapur, I terus tak boleh tidur. Takut okay.

In July, I moved out from my previous house sebab I dah rasa tak selamat kat sana. Rumah sewa I yang baru ni sangat awesome because it's an apartment! The rental is quite pricey tapi the security, insyAllah guaranteed. So I okay sikit lah. Nothing much happened in August, except I somehow macam dapat hidayah or some sort to finally stop the affair. I think God loves me, and He wants to protect me from getting hurt any further.

So in September, I've burned bridges. I quit the affair. I blocked him from my life. It was hard. I was miserable and I couldn't stop crying for days. But Tuhan dah susun semua kan, I've made friends with some of the most amazing people in my life yang have been here with me throughout the detox process. Like I said, it was hard at first, but I've managed. Also, in September, we managed to secure tickets to India!

October is all about my India planning. I was excited!

Then November came. India trip is finally happening! It was the best moment of my life so far. Bila pergi India, I bersyukur sangat I quit the affair. When I was in India, I could truly feel how much God loves me. He has saved me from a monster in disguise. Alhamdulillah. It was truly an eye opening experience for me, spiritually, and emotionally. I've learned about forgiveness. To you, if you are reading this, I would like to say, I have forgive you despite the fact that you never did a proper apology to me. I know you don't know what you did wrong. I know you think you were not wrong. But I was hurt. You have hurt me, but I have moved on. Those three months were the worst months in my life, ever. I wish you all the happiness in the world, because I am truly much happier now. Alhamdulillah. And I believe, you are too.

I could say that India has saved my 2016.

Back from India in December, I could say that I've changed. I'm still the old Mira, or Belle, some might call, but something inside me has changed. I don't know what, but I'm about to discover it this year.

Overall, lessons learnt from 2016:

  1. Friends can hurt you too
  2. It's never too late to walk away from something that hurt you
  3. Just burn all the bridges that took you nowhere, or worse, that took you to your misery
  4. Learn to forgive. Forgive whoever did you wrong and most importantly, learn how to forgive yourself
  5. God is great. Just believe in Him. He knows. Have faith in His plan
  6. Learn how to be alone. Learn to enjoy having only yourself as a company. It's not that bad
  7. Keep exploring things around you
  8. Appreciate everybody who walk into your life. If you truly want them to stay, cherish them. Not manipulate them. Show that you care, show that you love them
  9. Sometimes you have to be selfish for your own good

I have my wishes for 2017 too, which are:

  1. I want to work on my relationship with God. 2016 was not a good year for me spiritually, so I want to be a much better muslim this year. I want to run, to sprint towards Him 
  2. I want to spend more time with my family. If ada rezeki lebih, I want to take them to a vacation, all expenses me, InsyaAllah.
  3. I want to live a healthier life. Well, I managed to shed a few kilos in 2016, and I want to keep it that way too, only I want to be healthier and fit
  4. I want to be financially stable. 2016 has subtly taught me about money management
  5. I want to work hard and smart. I know my workload is gonna me superbly a lot this year, so I hope I'll manage and make no mistake ever
  6. I want to broaden my network, and keep my circle closer. My circle has grown smaller, but it's okay, I need to screen the people that I want to keep. Alhamdulillah I found a few quality friendship in 2016, and I hope that would stay. InsyaAllah.
  7. I hope I found the love of my life this year. Amin.

All in all, I wish you and me, may we all found what we lost, and may 2017 would be a GREAT year for us. 


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