this urge, to find the lost-me ; where are you, myself?

this few months, i have suffered a very critical identity crisis. i just felt that i don't even know myself anymore.

i've lost my self-esteem,
i've lost my identity,
i've lost myself.

and now i'm confused.

i just can't stop complaining, whining, and rambling nonsense stuff. i see things differently just to make myself felt better and hell, it didn't.

i couldn't blame PMS. shit, no one suffered hormonal for few months.

i've gone paranoia,
just wait for the time that i would gone mental.

euuwww~
nauzubillah.

ouh, i really need a getaway. i just wish that i have the guts and go somewhere all by myself.
take the risk, you know.
going to mall alone, relaxing at beach all by myself enjoying the scenery, or just have a little walk.

i wish i could walk in the rain. maybe it would make me feel better. i need to search for myself.

i have lost myself with being paranoia and all.

since the semester started i have this annoying feelings, the nausea, the ... ouh, i don't know the words.

if and only if i have the guts. and the weather would be okay in the evening, i would like to start with the lake.

wish i have the guts, and the weather is okay.

wish that luck is with me.

i have to search for myself. i need to search the inner me. i have this urge to find my inner-peace.

when anything, just anything couldn't relieved me, i need to turn back. i need to go to the basic.

oh GOD, i am searching for you.

.